32. “Loving Across Racial Divides,” Amy Steinbugler
In spite of dramatic positive shifts in public attitudes toward racial intermarriage, only a small percentage of people in the United States date and marry across racial lines. Steinbugler’s research explores the ways that race impacts daily life for interracial couples, finding that racism continues to shape everyday life in three primary ways. First, because of racial neighborhood segregation, many interracial couples face challenges of belonging and ease in residential spaces. Second, in spite of intimate relationships, interracial couples may not share the same perspectives on race and racism: White partners in interracial relationships can reflect the attitudes of many White Americans who question the scope and severity of contemporary racism. Finally, interracial couples sometimes reflect the power of racial-gender stereotypes within their relationships.
Some highlights:
In spite of dramatic positive shifts in public attitudes toward racial intermarriage, only a small percentage of people in the United States date and marry across racial lines. Steinbugler’s research explores the ways that race impacts daily life for interracial couples, finding that racism continues to shape everyday life in three primary ways. First, because of racial neighborhood segregation, many interracial couples face challenges of belonging and ease in residential spaces. Second, in spite of intimate relationships, interracial couples may not share the same perspectives on race and racism: White partners in interracial relationships can reflect the attitudes of many White Americans who question the scope and severity of contemporary racism. Finally, interracial couples sometimes reflect the power of racial-gender stereotypes within their relationships.
Some highlights:
- Current public attitudes toward racial intermarriage are represented by the fact that two-thirds of Americans say it would be fine with them for a family member to “marry out of their racial or ethnic group."
- High degrees of racial segregation by neighborhoods remain the norm in northeastern cities like New York and Philadelphia.
- Black partners in interracial relationships anticipate racial discrimination and take proactive measures to prevent it, whereas white partners are less attuned to discrimination and more comfortable with a wait- and-see approach.
- Intermarriages between Asian Americans and whites are more common than those between Blacks and whites.
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Please note, this is not optional. All students are required to post a comment or a question for each post. I ask that you please read through your classmates' comments here and on the forums and maybe even reply to a comment or two (on either format, up to you!) in the interest of keeping it interactive.
What I found most interesting about this reading is that despite the increased societal acceptance of interracial marriages, there's still this internalized tension on behalf of both races because of their different life experiences. The perceived racial minority, who has had to deal with their place in the hierarchy, approaches everything with caution. The white person, who has lived at the top of the racial hierarchy, experiences tension is misunderstanding this cautious approach. It seems this is the case because despite how people are saying they are becoming more accepting, they are not showing it by differentiating large systems like neighborhoods. This puts interracial couples in an uncomfortable position that brings this internalized tension to light as someone always seems to be put in an uncomfortable position. However, I see the beginning of interracial structures as starting with one brave person (White, Black, or Asian) being brave enough to gain comfort in an environment that has a different dominate race than their own that encourages others to be a part of similar environments. For me, this reading shows that addressing this discomfort first, and why one may feel it, needs to come first before interracial social systems may prosper and we can work toward racial equality.
ReplyDeleteThe quote "current public attitudes toward racial intermarriage are represented by the fact that two-thirds of Americans say it would be fine with them for a family member to “marry out of their racial or ethnic group" brings up the struggle that interracial couples face as a result of the split in American society. Couples are worried about and face discrimination by the other one-third of Americans. An example of this is the debate that sparked as a result of a Cheerios ad from 2013 that depicted a biracial family. There was both an outcry of support and hatred for the ad to include many racial slurs. I think that the best way to reduce discrimination of interracial couples and families is through the continued normalization and representation of them as normal. Therefore, I believe that Cheerios took a step in the right direction with their ad in 2013, but in order to do so you must be prepared for the response from those who are not ready yet.
ReplyDeleteI found it interesting but not surprising that black partners in an interracial relationships assume that they will be discriminated against while white individuals tend to wait for something to happen. I believe that this is because of the bias and fear that African Americans experience in society in general when they alone go outside, so being in an interracial relationship adds to the tension. As previously stated, there is the one third of Americans who are bothered by interracial relationships. Simply knowing that there are people who do not approve of the relationship adds tension to relationships that create unnecessary stress. Part of this stress is not knowing who does not approve or how violent people are willing to get. Two examples, the first is the new Netflix show, Love is Blind, produced an interracial couple who are shown facing adversity once they are home meeting each others families. There love has conquered all and they are living happily as the interracial power couple of the year. While this is uplifting not all interracial couples experience this support. I am in an interracial relationship where my boyfriend is Native American, together we have gotten rude comments and have been given rude slurs such as backwards Pocahontas. Based on the experiences I have had, I am not surprised at the increased tension within relationships who are trying to find balance and happiness without the bias of society chiming in.
ReplyDeleteThe blog post is very interesting as a i have a few first-hand experiences of interracial relationships and how it effected the respective families. One of my friends in highschool was a white female and she was dating a black male. The relationship was fine they lasted for about 3 years until they broke up. I remember talking to the girl as she was (a close friend of mine) about how things were going in the relationship and she said "good but, it gets difficult making excuses to my parents about why I'm out so late all the time". At first, this seemed like a reasonable reaction that the parents would have and I assumed they didn't want her daughter out with her boyfriend all night. I asked, "why don'y you two just hang at your house". I received a reaction as if i was crazy for suggesting that. She told me that her parents did not know she was in a relationship and I thought it was because they didn't want her dating yet however, this was not the case. It was who she was dating that would pose a problem to her parents as they did not want to see her in an interracial relationship. Obviously this toxic family attitude became a root cause in their eventual breakup and I would later learn more of my friends suffered similar problems with interracial dating. Another personal experience I had witnessed was one of my close highschool friends who came out gay in his college years and started dating interracially. Not only did they have to face the hardships and difficulties of being apart of the LGBT community, but the comments and criticism targeted at his boyfriend (as a black man). They are still together and from the last time we talked, they are doing extremely well but every day present a new obstacle for them to overcome as a couple.
ReplyDeleteOne thing that really stood out to me from these reading is that although 43% of people now view interracial marriage and relationships as a positive change in society, there are still a lot of hardships that these individuals have to face. The main one being feeling comfortable inn raced spaces. In a lot of situations, living together being one of the big ones, one partner will a lot of the time feel uncomfortable. A white person can feel uncomfortable if they live in a predominantly black neighborhood, and a black person can feel uncomfortable if they are living in a predominantly white neighborhood. This really stood out to me because it was something that I have experienced before. Not necessarily in a romantic relationship, but it more or less was the same experience. My black friend and I had 2 white guy friends. A weekend we went to one of their lake houses to go tubing, and we were the only 2 black people on the lake and in the restaurant. They did their best to make us feel comfortable, but it ended up being a very uncomfortable situation and we even had a random guy come up and make some unnecessary remarks. Neither of us was in a relationship with either one of them and it was still hard for us to feel comfortable, so I could only imagine the kind of hardships that people in interracial relationships have to go through on a daily basis. I think that this issue is deeply rooted in society, which does not surprise me and I believe that we need to work towards respecting each other despite races for this feeling of discomfort and shame towards interracial couples to end.
ReplyDeleteGiven how negatively people used to see interracial couples, 2/3 of American seeing o problem of someone in their family marrying out of their race is a movement forward. I honestly thought that number would be higher though. My sister has dated a few guys who were Black and she didn’t face a lot of judgement. She sometimes would get dirty looks from older people when she went out with her partner at the time but no one ever verbally harassed them. My parents were worried that their families wouldn’t be welcoming but the welcomed my sister with open arms and wanted to teach her about their culture and family history. In my extended family, one of my cousins who is in her 40’s now married a Black man when she was 20ish and my Grandpa on that side, who was an abusive and very mean man, would always make racist comments about the pair. After my grandpa passed, my cousin finally felt comfortable enough to come to family events and visit with that side of the family.
ReplyDeleteI did have one question, if the higher rate or racial segregation because of socioeconomic status?
Something that stood out to me was that "Current public attitudes toward racial intermarriage are represented by the fact that two-thirds of Americans say it would be fine with them for a family member to “marry out of their racial or ethnic group."". This stood out because the families of people in interracial relationships play a big role in the relationship themselves. Many people do not look outside of their race for relationships because of how their family perceives people of other races. There are often many stipulations in interracial relationships for example interracial relationships of black and white people. White people do not reap the repercussions of their societal and ethnic communities. Black communities often feel a disconnect with white people in relationships because of past history and oppression, and they frown upon someone who can choose to cherish and love a race that has such a rocky history. However, white people are more likely to receive backlash from close family and friends because they often times view black people as below them. Therefore, I do agree with this post because people attitudes and mannerism trickle down from their family and unfortunately, family opinions still play a major role in people's relationships in today's society.
ReplyDeleteIt is definitely a shock that in 2020, we are still dealing with the attitude that interracial marriage is not acceptable. "because of racial neighborhood segregation, many interracial couples face challenges of belonging and ease in residential spaces." This first primary way that racism shapes everyday life, according to Steinbugler, reminded me of when we watched the youtube video that showed have there was an app for people to know where the "ghetto" was. It is the same type of racial profiling. Of course, this in no way, shape, or form is okay. Another thing that stood out to me was that "intermarriages between Asian Americans and whites are more common than those between Blacks and whites." Yes, this is an interracial marriage. But, why is it more acceptable to for a white person to marry an Asian American than it is to marry a Black person?
ReplyDeleteIn Chapter 32, I was intrigued by the difference of perception of how "Black and White partners perceived race very differently" (p. 305). It reinforces the idea of positionality and how our lived experiences affect the way in which we see the world and how interact with others. Reading the material shows a kind of consistent struggle to find some grounding in the life together, even though their love "may be accepted" by their communities. In addition to this finding, it's also interesting reading the data showing more commonality between marrying Asian Americans and Whites. Maybe this is a result of the systemic approach of seeing Asian Americans as honorary whites?
ReplyDeleteIt is interesting to me the the chapter mentions how individuals in interracial relationships might have different opinions and views of racism in the United States, which makes a lot of sense but I had never thought of it before. Everyone comes into a romantic relationship with preconceived notions, ideas of the world, expectations and ideas of what a family looks like, and cultural traditions, all of which bring personality and hindrances into that relationship. When one person in a relationship has personally experienced deep rooted discrimination on a global scale and has the burden of centuries of ancrestral slavery and abuse, I can see where it would be hard for them to feel like thier partner can understand that having not experienced it themselves.
ReplyDeleteLindsey, I think that was a great example to highlight. It's especially troubling to think about so many people being against interracial relationships, specifically I think about our states history with Loving v. Virginia and the fact that interracial marriage was illegal up until 1967 and still socially unacceptable for many years after the fact. One role many of us may one day have working in the Communications field is being sure to include different groups in messaging to help continue the normalization you mentioned is so critical.
ReplyDeleteThis was a really interesting reading that brought up topics and discussions I hadn't thought about regarding parenting. It's still so startling to me that so many people have issues still with interracial relationships. Despite most people believing we are in a "post race society" it's chapters like these that make us realize that we are very much not. While people are still focused on the race of people in a relationship, it's going to be difficult to achieve the 'post race society' that people somehow want.
ReplyDeleteI personally think that dating and marriage outside of a persons ethnic background will forever be hard. It is not about whether the world is more accepting but because the first term we learned in this class, Intersectionality. Everyone has different experiences based on what categories they align their selves with and it can't be more highlighted in interracial families. In America the biggest difference in background comes with being black or white. When it comes to children in these families it can be hard because some have to choose which part of their ethnic backgrounds of their parent to identify with. I think that we all know where changes can be made but the question is how?
ReplyDeleteJust as in the chapter on same-sex relationships I discussed my concerns about the children of this family relationships. My highest concern is always the children. Therefore, I think you make an interesting point of the child does not know which identity to identify with. Which may lead them confused of their personal identity. They should be able to embrace both, but it in this world unfortunately they have to choose on or the other.
DeleteIn this chapter we also see key racism issues that individuals still experience today such as the black man not wanting to get pulled over and classified under a stereotype. As individuals we should not be afraid to get pulled over because of the color of our skin. This is very heartbreaking because police are here to protect us, not to cause hard, at least most of them,
I was surprised by the finding only a small amount of individuals are in interracial relationships. I thought more individuals were in interracial relationships today. I do believe it is unfortunate for your relationship to be based on the color of your skin.
ReplyDeleteOne of the things that stuck out to me from this reading is how individuals of interracial relationship are supposed to feel happy in their residential homes? As the book discusses it seems the two will always be at odds with somewhere to live. One place will be it seems, "too black" and the other "too white." So where does the couple find a common ground to live and feel comfortable.
To be able to relate this topic to our other chapter this week, just as society changed to having a majority positive attitude now towards interracial marriages, I think the same thing will happen for same-sex families. For so long it was frowned upon for interracial couples, and now we have come a long way in accepting this task.
Reading through your comments here and on last week's discussion board, I am reminded how much I miss discussing the material with you in a face-to-face classroom setting. I appreciate what each of you shared, whether it was from a personal perspective or engaging with specific readings or links. Thank you again for putting your energy into these posts. I am also grateful that you seem to be enjoying/interested in the readings of late.
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